If you follow me on social (Instagram is where I am most active) you will have seen that I’ve been having a bit of a rough time of late and that last week I had a no good, very bad, day.
One of those black days where it all seems overwhelming and you aren’t sure if or how you are ever going to dig yourself out.
The record playing in my brain went like this:
You haven’t sold the car yet. You still have $6,000 on the credit card for the van. (Even though was on 0% for 18 months it was causing me anxiety.) You had to pay nearly $2k to the IRS because you didn’t understand self employment taxes correctly, and have to pay them another $400 in April.
You didn’t get income for Jan and hardly any for Feb, so you put living expenses on credit instead of using efund, so that’s another $1.5K. You got debt free in 2018 and then immediately bought your parents a 40th wedding anniversary cruise. It would have been paid off had you had normal income in Jan/Feb, but because you didn’t: that’s more debt! (Also there is a lesson in this self – if you care to listen.)
You have over $10,000 in debt. Your car isn’t selling. You have no bookings coming in. You have screwed yourself over. I don’t know how you are ever going to get yourself out of this mess. It could take years. Your car may never sell.
All the above, played around in my head over and over again while I cried. For hours. It wasn’t pretty. Also fueled by too much coffee, struggling to get things done, while on week three of being ill with the cold/infection that would not go away. I was worn down, tired, sick, and anxious.
It was ugly guys.
THERE IS A THEN PEOPLE!!!
I recently opened a business mail box and put it on the about me page because mail is everything and brings me tremendous joy. Should you like to write me you may here:
4227 South Meridian c-491
Puyallup, WA 98373
THEN. I checked my mail and there was a letter. Barbara – if you are out there – you changed my life that day. I was in a dark place and your letter reminding me of all I had accomplished and your kind words took me right out of it and I was able to remind myself it would be okay.
So, then I cried a lot for different reasons. And it was good. And cleansing. And that letter is now up on my wall. I don’t know where it came from as it had no return address and no last name, but Barbara, your kind impulse to write me changed my life. Thank you.
What do I want you to take away from this? Follow through, immediately, on your kind impulses. How many times have we thought we should pop a note or card to someone or we’d like to send a flower or something small and we never follow through? We look back and regret we didn’t, and think it is now too late.
IT IS NEVER TOO LATE.
Follow through on your kind impulses. I’ve worked hard to incorporate this into my life the last few years and it has only had positive impacts on my self and those I’ve impulsed. Yep. Grammar that y’all.
Yep, there is an and.
The very next day an elderly lady stopped to look at my car. Took it for a test drive and as we pulled into my drive said, “I want it. I’ll bring you cash in the morning if you’ll hold it overnight.” Uh, yes. Yes, please.
And she did. She didn’t dicker price or anything! I got more for the car than I anticipated and put that immediately on the credit card. So while I still have the remaining debt – I’ll manage it.
I got this.
We got this. Whatever you are going through: you got this. You are not alone. I am cheering for you. I have faith in you. We got this – together.