I have a SECRET identity.

Before I was Disabled Girl on Fire.  I was Thriving Disabled.  This was a blog/podcast that I tried to launch anonymously.  Anonymity was a major problem.  I was trying to be all cloak and dagger, and I couldn’t be outright fully honest.  I realized that by hiding and being stealthy I wasn’t going to help anyone and after doing the podcast it brought a HUGE problem to the forefront. 

I was living a life of complete and total fear.  I was terrified all the time.  

There was a lot of processing that happened and eventually, after talking to Gwen and J of FireDrill Podcast in the most frank manner I have ever spoken to anyone I realized I couldn’t hide.  I couldn’t down play things any more.  I couldn’t pretend everything was fine, or believe that my SSDI, or health issues were no one’s business.  I had to stop living in shame and guilt and only by being open could I help anyone else struggling.  Only by being open could I truly be me.  Me at my best. 

I called Gwen and cried over the phone with her, emailed J, and ultimately came to the decision that I was going public.  I was going to be open and honest and I had to accept that judgement and criticism was going to come into my life.  People have no idea what choices I am forced to make because I don’t show them.   

I’m here, and I know there are other disabled bloggers here.  Being disabled doesn’t mean you’ll never FIRE.  It may mean your FI journey may be different, but when I discovered Mr. Money Mustache in 2012 it changed my life and I believe FIRE principles can improve anyone’s life regardless of income or health status. 

There are some misunderstandings in the summary/podcast, but it is the open and honest discussion that made me realize I no longer wanted to be driven by fear.  I wanted a chance to reach for whatever I could accomplish.  I wanted the choice.  Here is me. Choosing.

Here’s me: Super Secret Podcast from Fire Drill Podcast. 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.